I’m not going to lie.
I never had a really good vibe when I heard they were making more Star Wars sequels. Part of it is just temperamental, I didn’t
think there was much else you could do with the story, or its characters. All Harrison Ford’s exit from the franchise did
was confirm my misgivings. Because of
the personal letdown that was The Force Awakens,
I went into The Last Jedi with no
great hope that anything would work out.
The whole “this was a bad idea” vibe was still with me even before the
sequel came out. Then there was the
movie itself.
What did I think?
Well, I can’t call it a good film in any objective sense. I know I was letdown. I wondered (for a time, at least) if I was
still a fan of this series. The irony
came later, when I had a chance to really sit down and think about the film as
an objective whole. After giving it a
lot of thought, I have just one question.
Did the filmmaker’s actually want
the movie to fail? I know how that
sounds, and it’s still the same question I always get drawn back to.
What made me ask in the first place was the growing
awareness of the specific type of writing going with The Last Jedi. It helps to understand what I’m talking about
when you remember that the traditional elements in storytelling mostly boil
down to just three concepts. These are:
Setup, Conflict, and Resolution. Modern
Hollywood seems uneasy with the last point.
I’ll swear on a stack of Bibles, however, that The Last Jedi is the first film I’ve seen where the writer appears
determined to sabotage the narrative at every single step of the way. The script actually reads as if the
screenwriter wanted to ruin his own career by penning the most incomprehensible
film in cinematic history.
The way the TLJ script goes about this is to take a basic
setup, and then complicate and monkey-wrench the scenario with plot
developments that do one of the following; (a) make no sense from a strategic
point of view; (b) painting situations into inexplicable corners, and then
refusing to fix any and all plot holes once they’ve been created; (c) making
creative decisions that could be construed as being the exact opposite of their
stated intent.
To take things in order, let’s unpack these three
points one at a time, starting with:
The Dumbest Fictional Armies of All Time.
When they think of a great military leader, Americans
will often point to figures like George Washington, or Gen. Dwight
Eisenhower. These men are exemplars for
different, yet equally valid reasons.
Washington was not without a sense of personal
ambition. However, this was always
tempered by his experiences as a soldier in the British Army. The constant short-sighted nature of his
commanding officers was always made apparent, so that it was something
Washington could never forget. More to
the point, he was aware of how the incompetence of the C.O.’s was often passed
down to the grunts, when it was the mistaken thought of the officers that
resulted in so much wasted life and effort.
Because of having these early learning experiences drummed into him time
and again, Washington was able to learn both a genuine humility, as well as a
practical experience he was able to put to good use once he started to help
create the first American Armed Forces.
It is because he was able to learn from mistakes that Washington
ultimately became such an effective leader on the field of battle.
Eisenhower’s achievements lie in the way of being able
to gain as thorough an understanding of his opponents as possible, in order to
out-guess and out-flank them. This is
most evident in Ike’s skirmishes with Field Marshall Irwin Rommel. Eisenhower would go so far as to keep both
photographs, as well as copies of Rommel’s military records with him wherever
he went, just for the sake of keeping in mind the psychology of his
adversary. This had two benefits. On the one hand, Ike would be able to gain an
actual working knowledge of Rommel, to the point where he could anticipate the
Field Marshal’s next move, and act so as to gain the upper hand. At the same time, none of this would have
been possible if Eisenhower hadn’t had enough respect for his enemy. Because he was able to develop a proper
understanding of his enemies on the field of battle, Eisenhower was able to see
which strategic choices meant a path to victory, and which to avoid.
In addition to this, Eisenhower also knew how to treat
his subordinates in a way that inspired both loyalty, as well as group
morale. I can remember watching a D-Day
documentary in which an old British soldier recalled being on passport
inspection duty, and he ran across Gen. Ike.
“I'm sorry, sir”, the soldier told him, nervous as hell, “but I’ll have
to see some ID”. To which Ike simply
handed over his papers, chuckled, and said “That’s alright son, you’re just
doing you’re job”.
This anecdote is important, for it does have a
reflection, albeit twisted and warped, in the form of the old Expanded Universe
character, Grand Admiral Thrawn. If
Admiral Ackbar is the closest the franchise has to a George Washington or Ike,
then Thrawn is something like Rommel.
Thrawn is not without a sense of ruthlessness, yet he was also a
disciplined tactician. He knew that more
could be accomplished with simple hit-and-fade strike operations, than the needless waste
of an all-out assault. In addition,
Thrawn knew when to encourage both loyalty and high morale for his troops. It’s therefore a shame to see a character as
intelligent as Ackbar dumbed down for the sake of such an ill-defined creative
goal.
One of the strengths of the Original Trilogy is that
there were parts of the plot that at least had a modicum connection to real
life military campaigns. It’s true there
is a great deal of separation between real armies and make-believe ones, and it
is a mistake to expect realism in works of fiction in general. Still, the Originals
still knew how to draw inspiration from real life military battles in a way
that was able draw audiences in, based on a recognizability between Rogue
Squadron and real-life Air Force exploits.
In contrast, the battles in The Last Jedi are little more than a military tactician’s worst
nightmare. What is seen on-screen goes
beyond any concept of poor planning.
This like Ike going to bed the day before the D-Day assault and waking
up to find all the Allies had been replaced with Nazis and vice-versa. Dozens of examples have been cited by others,
such as the inability of a bomber to drop its load in a zero-gravity
environment. That and the puzzling
question of how a person can open a hanger into one great vacuum and not
automatically strangle to death and get sucked out into to space at the same
time. Other examples to cite: multiple instances of the bad guys not taking
advantage of a situation and just opening fire when their opponents are
defenseless, not sending one half of your army ahead to cut off the resistance
at their rendezvous point, thus blocking them in on all sides, the First Order
succeeding despite all the commanding officers having the military skill of a Three
Stooges short. “And so it goes”. However, these flaws barely scratch the
surface of what’s wrong with this film.
Nonsensical Plotting and Characterization.
While it is easy to cite all the gaffs and leaps in
logic that the story requires, these are just bits and pieces of a greater
problem. The greatest insight I took
away from TLJ is that it all seemed like a made to order failure. In
other words (this is going to sound crazy), I just can’t shake the idea that
the screenwriter (whether it be Rian Johnson or some anonymous ghost author)
always wrote himself in to a corner on purpose.
Whoever wrote this garbage knew it was tripe from the very first
line. For whatever reason, that seems to
have been the motivating drive for the author, and maybe even the director.
I can already anticipate the possible objections to
this premise. Why would someone
deliberately set himself up for failure?
Isn’t that just poor business sense?
The answer is that of course it’s a mistake to try to crash and burn on
purpose, especially in a Post-Recovery economy.
None of this changes the fact that the film always sets up a scene, and
it’s characters, with each new scene, only to bring all the action to an
irrecoverable halt. We need Luke
Skywalker to save the day? Well, he
never wanted to be found because of “reasons”.
Our heroes are running out of fuel, and they need some plan to throw the
bad guys off their trail? Well, we’re
not going to take any smart course of action, or do anything like craft a workable
strategy to fight back or anything, even if, especially because, everyone’s
life is the line. All these creative choices show the guiding thread
weaving through the whole film’s runtime.
Everybody makes the choice that guarantees failure. All characters must try and pass the buck
before everything else. Under no
circumstance must any character try and assume and shoulder a genuine
responsibility. Under such a
bass-ackward code of ethics, the one logical creative choice would be to reveal
that the good guys we’re outnumbered from very start by a cadre of spies who
we’re secretly pulling the strings behind the scenes, all the while
steering guilt-racked and grief-stricken Leia further on to a dead-end trap
from which she couldn’t escape. It might
be a downer ending, but at least such a scenario would help make a kind of
sense out of two bloody hours many audiences will never get back.
In addition, the right way of handling this scenario would make a repeat
viewing more suspenseful as audiences tried to piece together who was in on the
act, and which actions were designed to make the Resistance fail. It would also create the necessary suspense
to leave things on a cliff-hanger, leaving the audience wanting more, and eager
for the release of the ninth episode in the series.
Of course, none of this is what happens in the
finished product. Instead, we’re left
with the same fact. The story is pushed
further into one big plot-hole from which nothing can be salvaged. We’re also left with the uncomfortable
feeling that the whole film was written with the intention of not only digging
the pit, but also lying in it. If there
is any validity to that idea, then all I can do is sit and wonder why would an
artist want to craft such a non-success in the first place? What mind set could be so off-kilter as to
perform an act artistic self-sabotage?
The most immediate takeaway is that whoever wrote this must be some kind
of sociopath. Where I’m supposed to go
beyond such ruminations I just don't know.
I would need to know a lot more than what Disney or the filmmakers are
giving us at the moment. What I can say
with a fair degree of certainty is that right now Star Wars seems to be in the care of people who don’t know what
they’ve got on their hands.
That sort of begs the question though. Just what is Star Wars? What does it mean
in terms of the kind of story it is, and its effects the culture at large? Well, I’ve thought about that. While I can’t say I have all the answers, I
did at least find an opportunity to listen to something which helped me clarify
just what drew people to the OT in the first place. Since I don’t want to leave this series of
posts on a sour note, and a bitter taste in the mind, I’d like to spend a few more essays on this topic by outlining a concept that might help clarify the
question of why we fell for a place I now prefer to think of these days as The
Far-Far Away. In doing so, I’d also like
to offer a few ideas that just might help clarify the age-old question of
canon. Stick around if you want the
possibility of cleansing your pallet after such a hard slog. Till next time, May the Force be with you.
In my opinion, it's the third-best movie in the franchise, behind only the first two.
ReplyDeleteWell, at least you got more out of it than I did.
DeleteI'm still not entirely finished with this series, yet thankfully, the finish line is somewhere in sight.
I'll get to future posts in this series soon enough, right now I'm just giving this post some more time me to see what kind of responses it generates. I wouldn't be surprised if I just walked into a minefield.
C'est la vie.
ChrisC.
The entire internet is one big minefield, so far as I can tell. but the subject of Star Wars does seem to be especially dense with mines these days, no doubt about it.
DeleteI haven't seen TLJ but TFA hasn't aged well in my head. (And I didn't see SOLO or ROGUE ONE, either.)
ReplyDeleteInteresting parallels drawn with Rommel and Eisenhower and Washington, though. I'll keep that in mind when I eventually sit down to watch it.
Spoiler alert. Ol' Ack takes the dirt nap and...Mary Poppins in Space. I wish I was making that up.
DeleteAs for "Rogue One", I knew something was wrong when the main cast took their final bow, and instead of tears in my eyes, my thought was something like, "Wait, huh?.....(snorts) Jerks."
At least someone got a good parody trailer out of it, though:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKttQ35tiac
ChrisC
My argument on these would be:
Delete(1) Ackbar isn't a character; he's a makeup and a voice. He's lucky he even got to be in these new movies.
(2) The "Mary Poppins" thing is actually one of my favorite parts of the movie. Leia is blown out into space, presumably dead. But no, her Force powers -- can't call 'em Jedi powers, exactly, I guess -- kick in and she literally plucks herself out of death's clutches. In this moment, she reveals herself to be MASSIVELY powerful, but in a very different way to any other Force-sensitive we've ever seen. I'll admit the staging of it does make her look a wee bit like Mary Poppins, but I'm unable to see that as a negative thing.
(3) Pretty much the only things I didn't like about "Rogue One" were Forrest Whittaker, CGI Tarkin, and CGI Leia. I get why you'd swing for the fences with those digital characters; I'd also argue that if you couldn't do better than that, you should probably just recast.
Otherwise, though, good flick.
It's certainly not universally popular, though. My friend Trey (who passed away this summer at much too young an age) thought it was a complete bore.
I feel I'm missing some jokes with that trailer, but I chuckled a few times.
DeleteSome of the things I've read about the new SW movies really perplex me. Like, the idea that making "so many" standalone movies is a bad thing or what not. That one got started and then became part of an echo chamber and it just seemed to never make any sense. Who cares how many standalone movies they make? I don't understand that one. If you don't want to see it, don't go see it, sheesh; problem solved. But this was like an actively debated topic, day in and day out.
Anyway, to be completely honest, I really have little interest in new iterations of both Star Wars or Star Trek. I wish everyone well. There's a type of Star Wars fan (the "OMG MY LIFE IS COMPLETE NOW THAT THERE'S NEW STAR WARS!" social media poster) that depresses, annoys, and kind of offends me all in equal measure. I overstate / exaggerate. I DO wish everyone well, including this sort of SW fan, it's just a posturing I'll never understand.
Speaking of Thrawn, I'm reminded of one of the frequently-cited reasons why the new Star Wars movies are disliked: their discarding of the EU. I can't consider myself an EU fan, exactly; but I was at one point in time, and I can pinpoint for you precisely when that point in time began -- the day "Heir to the Empire" was released. That book was a BIG deal, because it seemed that there were never going to be any more Star Wars movies, and Lucas had publicly stated (or so I remember it) that these were the legit sequels.
ReplyDeleteI haven't read any of those books in a long time, but "Heir to the Empire" and its two followups were thrilling as can be at the time. And some of the other books and comics that came after were just as good. Eventually, I dropped off the bandwagon; the quality dipped significantly, plus there were just too many of them to keep up with. But I retain a fondness for the best of that stuff, even though I don't really remember much about them.
So for all that to be tossed out kind of is a tough pill to swallow. I get it. But adapting them into movie form was impossible given the ages of the original actors, so that was never going to happen; plus, it's just not how movie franchising works.
That said, I would still be in favor of Disney someday making a series of animated movies based on the best of those EU stories. Or, someday when the inevitable reboot of the entire saga happens, maybe those could be used to fuel a different take on Episodes VII-IX.
I can remember where I was when I first spotted a copy of "Heir to the Empire". It was in a chain called "Book Stop", one of those old brick and mortar franchises that got pushed out of the market (not that I'm bitter or anything!).
DeleteThe copyright date for "Heir" says it was released in 1991, so that must have been when I ran across it. It featured images of the Big Three, plus an image of a guy who looked like, but really wasn't Obi Wan Kenobi. I think my reaction was a mixture of, "Huh, whuuhhhh?", and, "Hmm, I wonder what that's about". Pretty inauspicious as far as taking an interest is concerned, but it seems to have paid off.
I have a bit more to say about the EU in a future post. This is one of those deals that seem to take on a life of their own, I'm afraid. Overall, I'm in favor of it, though I'm not without criticisms, but none of them have been like the ones I've had for "Dis-Wars".
On some other level of the Tower, the bad guys of the "Thrawn Trilogy" would be voiced by either Benedict Cumberbatch or John De Lancie, and Christopher Loyd respectively.
As for animated adaptations, well...:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PN_CP4SuoTU
Also:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ib_4A2CG2Ag
ChrisC
I'd read about "Heir to the Empire" in advance of its release. I don't remember how soon after that I got a copy, but it was either on release day or very soon thereafter. I was on a day trip to Atlanta with some friends; if I'm not mistaken, we went to see "What About Bob?" while we were there. I think this was also the trip where I first found a copy of the "Conan the Barbarian" soundtrack -- on cassette! -- to buy after looking for it forever. Good times.
DeleteI remember thinking the guy on the cover -- Joruus C'Baoth, right? -- looked like a Kenobi, too. He wasn't, but I remember thinking he was kind of cool anyways.
C'baoth, yeah, that's the guy. Timothy Zahn released an annotated version of "Heir" a while back. He said he wanted to make the character an actual insane clone of Alec Guinness's character, believe it or not. The higher ups told him it was a bad idea, though he kept fighting for it, for a while.
DeleteThe idea sounds a bit interesting on paper, however, I don't think it's something you could pull off. I think it would have just confused and upset people a bit too much. Since I can't find any real complaints about the books as published, I'd say the higher ups made the right call, this time, at least.
ChrisC
Just remember.
Delete"What about Bob", like "Ghostbusters 2", is one of those sadly neglected in Bill Murray's illustrious career, if ya ask me.
ChrisC.
I think it's a movie that nobody dislikes -- but for whatever reason, it does feel like it's been forgotten. Which is strange; it was a hit at the time, and by all rights ought to be considered a classic. I mean, Bill Murray, Richard Dreyfuss, Frank Oz ... what's not to like?
DeleteI also like the movie that was sandwiched between this and Ghostbusters 2. Nobody remembers that one: Quick Change. But it's a lot of fun.
Incidentally, I agree about the decision to NOT have C'Baoth be a Kenobi clone. It's an interesting idea, but I kind of enjoy when stories like this make their universe bigger. Having that character be a Kenobi makes it smaller. For the same reason, I don't need or want Rey to be a Skywalker, a Kenobi, a Calrissian, a Palpatine, or anyone other than a girl from nowhere.
Haven't seen quick change yet, though it is on my "to watch" list.
DeleteChrisC
I always thought Weird Al should have done a parody of "What About Bob?" set to Heart's "What About Life." Sometimes I (attempt to) amuse my wife with improvising such a thing - it's been one of my "Dad Jokes for Husbands" for years. I enjoy that movie.
DeleteYou guys inspired me to hunt through my boxes for the Star Wars EU books I have. I've never read any of them, but I have that trilogy of short stories (Tales from Mos Eisley, Jabba's Palace, of the Bounty Hunters), the Bounty Hunters war trilogy, the original Zahn trilogy (Heir to the Empire and the 2 that followed), X Wing Rogue Squadron and X Wing Wedge's Gamble.
If I were to focus on any of them, which should I read?
And definitely see "Quick Change!"
DeleteI would say the Zahn trilogy is definitely worth the read. Also, i would recommend the Dark Empire audiobook. It features Billy Dee Williams as Lando. I'll have more to say on that one later on.
DeleteChrisC.